My time will come

I attended the Sunday Mass and I am so happy to have heard that my college classmate is going to get married. Once again, it was announced to the public and that was the 2nd time I heard one of my college classmates being scheduled to get married.

I am so happy for them. One of my closest friends is also going to get married this year, the other one already got a new big world with her daughter. I am here supporting them, seeing them transformed into something new. My first cousin just got married this year too, and my male cousin which I really hated haha is going to get married too.

It seems like everyone’s getting married. I even encouraged my brother to find a wife that would accept him for his life choices and would encourage him to become that better version of him. I like seeing them being happy and together. It fills my heart with joy seeing how complete families are. That’s because I never had that kind of family.

Mine was broken into half, I never had such loving parents, they were young and doesn’t know parenting, I learned everything by observing my elders and choosing good people to influence me. That way, I know I can be free. Even until now, I still choose whom to be with, but most of the time, I’d spend my time alone. It’s quite and I kinda like it. I have a friend in me. My child self wants to come out when she’s not being watched, but she can be herself when she’s with the right people. It’s good to be free. It’s nice to be your true self.

Sometimes, I think that maybe I am destined to be with people instead of them being with me, but I also have friends; we may not see each other often but one day you’ll find us get together at the most unexpected time, all unplanned; like it just happened; our destination just matches and we just say YES to anything we can do when the time comes; like it’s meant to be.

My time will come, but I feel like.. Hmm.. Maybe it’s not for me. It is also because I have such a bad experience with family and my perception of family is kinda distorted. I have so much healings to do, and I have so much dreams and goals to accomplish. I wanted it with someone but I think it’s not going to happen. That’s probably why it’s not happening to me yet because I closed my mind about family, it felt too ugly for me; I can only hear my mothers negativities at the back of my mind, my father cheating on her; all those bad thoughts and her difficulties in believing it really happened; so full of drama; it’s like a recording that’s playing in the background.

Her confusion confuses me and it’s scary because it also happened to me, I had that fear of becoming either one of them and it’s just so scary. The shame that they both feel is just crazy. Me and brother just laughed at it. I wonder how my younger brother felt, being gossiped as a product of adultery just because his parents weren’t married. I hope one day when he’s grown older and was able to conquer shame, he’d find a way to keep his family; and as a sister, I am just right here willing to support him.

It is our joy to see them complete. Me and my bro have each other until we have chosen the right one for us. As the preaching says last Sunday, we only have one God, regardless of our religion, we call on to one God. Just like we may have different mothers but we have the same father. We are maybe boys and girls but we’re destined to marry one happy spirit. They may look different from each other, but they share the same life purpose.

Just like, I may not marry JK of BTS but I will marry JK-like someone. For sure there’s a lot of people like him, I just haven’t met them yet, but one day I will. I would definitely like to marry someone who can make me laugh like crazy 😂😋. I still have a lot to do. I still have to grow more and more and more until I am strong enough to stand on my own without falling into dependency. Until then, I’ll just be happy, knowing that my time will also come, I just have to grow a little more each day😊.

Published by Pinky Rose

Hi My Name is Roselyn and I am a Graduate in Business Administration Major in Management Accounting. I wanted to pursue a degree related to Property Management. I saw Commerce as something new to me. The Mother side of the family have Nurses and I want to become a Doctor in Psychology. They're soldiers too! I applied for PAF but wasn't allowed to take the exam because of my Myopia. The father side are into Politics and Farming, I could have taken Political Science or Agriculture, but my choice goes to Accountancy because it sounds so cool and it has a board exam (a requirement to be a Scholar). There are also teachers on my father side. My father is a good farmer, I love his plants. I hope I can offer him something very important. He stopped schooling, he choose to help his parents at the farm instead. My Mother was emotional and stopped schooling too. Later on, she had me then my brother; until she became emotional again and stopped being our mother. Me? I am always blessed and loved by the Universe and the Earthlings, they saw my potential and eagerness to learn new things. I choose to stay and share my knowledge. I wanted to become someone with a different attitude towards life; I'd rather not give than give out of pity; so if I'll give you something, it means you deserve it, not out of bias; I also want to be treated the same, win or lose I'll feel better, as long as it is righteous. Losing/failing will help me change and do the right thing. I am also into writing because I have plenty of ideas. I hope to earn a PHD; research papers are quite interesting; I will really have fun! I am into dancing, just for fun; Dancing is so funny specially if you can't get the steps then getting it right after, it doesn't bore. Singing is my natural born talent but I'm just kidding, maybe not 😃 just manifesting it. I have a book at Amazon KDP :; written mostly to thank those who have helped me grow spiritually. I finished my Caregiving Training from Feb 2019 to Jan 2020; then became a certified career since 2021. I am working on my personal business, to pursue my passion with a purpose to help the world heal emotionally. I am becoming successful in this kind of business and I claimed it, because I want to manifest it. I am a team player, I want to have fun. I am kindhearted and beautiful inside and out but don't get me wrong, it depends on the person I'm dealing with, I can be rude too like super rude! Taking advantage of me is big no no. You'll get what you deserve later on. I am a goal-oriented person, passionate in writing and sharing the right way. I am in love in all new things specially with JK's personality; he made me laugh out loud, it's so healing. My academic side isn't that bad but also not too good because I still have a lot of knowledge to earn. My friend advised me to exaggerate little achievements though to help me attract more of it. I have a good voice and a good sense of humor if I choose to let it all out. I am passionate and compassionate. I practice an attitude of gratitude. I prefer to be alone than be surrounded by bad influencial people, but I am keeping my heart open for the good guys too. I am receiving support from the Angelic Beings and a future husband that communicates with me telepathically; I'm not sure if I have met him already, all I know is that, he can guide me well. Whenever I am out of my mind and feeling like in danger, he takes over; I may or may not recognize him personally but it doesn't matter, I think he can but I have trust issues so it's normal to not meet him sooner and it's also normal to not recognize him, I guess he already knew. I have an eye in music and arts and love to cook for me. If you believe you will be healed if you'll ask me to heal you intuitively then you will, but it was you that heals you, not me. I can dance and laugh. I am treasuring happy memories. I welcome new experiences. I'm excited with first time events I can travel, take pictures of me with my coalleagues. I can contribute and be of service. I like Song Joongkis movies 😁 he's such a good actor, I have watched most of his movies, but all of his movies in Netflix. But above all, I really love Photography! It's beautiful and exciting to look for good angles. It's a great brain exercise to look at better things in life. ❤ Welcome to my Blog! You're allowed to share your thoughts in the comment sections. Also, please follow and share if you like my artwork. It will help me notice that we share the same values.

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