Sayings, Poems, Diaries, Self Affirmation, New thoughts, Advises, Food and Traveling Activities.
Author Archives: BU🧲
I published independently at Amazon KDP : https://amazon.com/roselynmina
I am now a certified career.
I am working on my personal business, to pursue my passion with purpose. I am becoming successful in online business, I claimed it, because I want to manifest it.
I am a team player, I want to have fun.
I am kindhearted, yes I am.
I am beautiful inside and out, charot.
I am a goal-oriented person.
I am passionate in writing.
I am passionate in sharing.
I am in love in all new things.
I am in love with JK's personality.
I have great success in my academic side, my friend advised me to exaggerate little achievements to help me attract more of it. It's a mind trick.
I have a good voice.
I have a good sense of humor.
I have passion.
I have compassion.
I have an attitude of gratitude.
I have friends who's always with me in my ups and downs.
I have an acting mother.
I have great support from the angels.
I have a best friend who communicates with me telepathically.
I have an eye in music and arts.
I love to cook for others.
I love to tell good news.
I love to be of help.
I love to help.
I love to heal.
I love to dance.
I love to laugh.
I love BTS.
I love happy memories.
I love new experiences.
I love first time experiences.
I love travelling.
I love taking pictures of me and my coallegues.
I love being me.
I love to contribute.
I love to appreciate.
I love to be of service.
I love to work lightly.
I practice tarot card reading.
I practice song writing.
I practice poem writing.
I don't care if you will bless me, share me.
I don't Care if you will love me and accept me for who I am and what I am not.
I don't care if you will marry me or not but I hope you will, haha. I like to wear HANBOK.
I don't care if you will praise me or not.
I don't care, your choice!
Aside from that, I really love Photography 🤭
#charlang who cares but I do!
#concernedcitizen trying to be cool 😊
2nd Week of June. It was a stressful week. I had so much in mind. I hear bad words, then I got triggered emotionally and it causes more fear in me. I forgive those people who have caused it and have intentionally did it to hurt me.
If it’s a test then they have succeeded but it’s not the end of the game just yet. I am still winning. You know why? Because my God is stronger than my own fear. I have dreams to pursue, so much plans in line. The narcissist is planning to hunt me down and come to her like a crying little baby begging for help.
But I am not that anymore. Yes, I got depressed most of the times whenever I hear a trigger, or whenever someone intentionally pushes the wrong button. It’s not easy to get back on tract once it is triggered. I hope they will be forgiven and I hope they won’t be hunt down by their own Karma. I still wish them well.
I know I am not winning if I am fighting, so I will let the Universe decide. What comes around comes back around. What you saw is what you reap. It wasn’t an easy week. It was full of struggles. I was mentally strained, I almost did not want to show up at my friends Bridal Shower! But after I went with these two! I changed my mind.
I will be bringing Soju on my friends Bridal Shower!!! 🎉 Thank you! I am telling you all, there is so much joy after every sadness and pain. I am just so blessed to have this kind of pattern. So when it happened again, I know good things will happen. These two always have my back.
My money’s only enough for a tricycle fair, but gut feeling told me to come out. My hands will not stop tapping me to get up and just show up. I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to eat with them because it’s Sunday and I’m not allowed to transfer money from my account to my other account. In short, I had no cash on hand.
But, just like before, I would always show up, and she’s always so kind to share her food with me, and he’s been so supportive with her. But this time, I’ll pay them back the next day coz it’s Monday and now I got money. I just feel so loved and accepted and understood.
She had me borrowed the dress and I kinda liked it, so I decided to just buy it. I hope she will sell it to me. My female cousin wants it so this will be useful for sure. Since Christmas is coming, I think it’s better to give little things that gentle hearts wants. Or maybe, i’ll just keep it coz I want it. It is really up to me.
Patience is always, I was already hungry, I didn’t eat, they’re too kind to offer me money for me to borrow. We’re not super rich but we care and I guess in every little thing we’re doing comes back to us in so many ways! I am so like that.
I can be an angel to those who have the kindest heart to offer me when I have nothing. And such the opposite to those who wouldn’t. That is my Bliss and it wouldn’t change. I guess my mother-figure knew it, she’s not just good in giving me what I truly deserve because she doesn’t listen to my needs. She only care about what she wants for me and she only care about others family.
Oh well, life is just so like that. When the lucky charm is lost because of irresponsibility, life started turning up-side down, until they will realize that the real treasure they have gone for good, they have rejected and have taken for granted. In the end of the day, it all went good for me.
Today, I am again so happy and so blessed. I have met new people that are so kind to us all. Uplifting people. Inspiring people. Motivating people. Respectful people! And most of all, people who will taught me how to net to make my own.
I met three new people, all with the same oppeness and kindness. The other one was the owner of the Restaurant we’ve visited for picture taking. A tripping that Aish loves to do. The next one was the wife of a DJ she’s also very charming. The 3rd one was a comedian actor, he smells so good, and he’s so tall big and very humble with a loving and sparkling heart. We were very blessed. We were like fairies.
Joy Riding was the best! Forever be grateful to the people who inspires me to be better every single day. There’s a home waiting for me. There are good people out there. I thought there were only bad once because that’s what they told me.
But when I started facing all my fears, these good people came out. It’s the most awesome experience I had! Many years ago, I thought there’s no such thing, but I met people who inspired me to keep myself open. People who showed me the truth.
The owner of Africa Restaurant is a korean and she’s the most prettiest and shining star I’ve met and seen yet. She’s very accommodating and friendly too. The place is really fancy! It was my first time and I was really amazed on how the place relaxes my body. The design and the stillness. It’s so vibrant.
Their comfort room is located outside, I think that’s what makes it unique from the rest of the nice Korean restaurant I had been. It’s surrounded by plants so it’s really nice.
Their waffle made me feel so full! Like so full! And yet, we still have to eat our dinner somewhere. So JR choose a restaurant. We’re so lucky we’ve met the PBA Legend, Mr. Balingit. He’s also a comedian actor. Such a humble person.
Happiness doesn’t care heights 🥳. We’re the cutest, the luckiest and the happiest that day! Thank you so much Guys. It all happened because I went with only a penny for a tricycle ride. Today, soon as the bank opened, I paid it all! 🥳 Then went to church to be thankful and grateful and be in peaceful surrounding for more release. Up next, “My College Classmates Bridal Shower”.
I am working on getting out from my comfort zone challenge and this is the 8th time I believe, I still have to check it out.
So yesterday, Sunday morning, I woke up and dance a little. I had to post it at FB just for fun and fb partially muted it due copyright issue.
I got bored and decided to go to Hey Jude’s Burger right after attending the mass online. I arrived at Jude’s Burger place, thanks to Google maps! But it was closed.
I paid only P 20 via Jeepney going to Marigondon Crossing from the Mactan Marcelo Bridge. I walked and walked straight until I arrived at that place. Then I have to walk for 1 minute more to arrive at the exact place.
I proceeded to Happy Museum in Cordova and had to pay another P 20 for the motorcycle ride. I arrived so early so I entertained myself by wearing hanbok.
It’s one of my dreams and finally, yesterday, it happened. I did it goise! I can feel the itch of success and happiness. A dream come true is a goal come true and I am so proud of me.
For P 50 pesos, I had so much fun posing and feeling like I am really in korea. Luckily, the staffs were so good, one of them took those photos. The other one entertained me with good stories while waiting for the other staff that will entertain me.
She said stories about live bands at night until 10Pm and sometimes they will be home late like past 12:00 Midnight because there are still customers drinking. Sometimes the place gets flooded too when it rains.
But most of all, they have eat-all-you-can food as well as other restaurants owned by different owners. I thought I was going to eat first but other customers came and they went straight to the entrance, so I followed.
It’s the first museum I have been. The second will be Hybe in korea. So watch me Nae Nae 🥳. Four places have been manifested. To this date, all of my best wishes have been slowly manifested.
Now let’s see what happened to me inside.
So this is what’s going to happen when you travel alone.
Dancing was never absent, I’ll upload it in my FB page. I had so much fun and I am so proud of me that I arrived there alone, safe and sound, came back home safe and sound too.
There’s so much more to see and so much more waiting for you. I encourage you to also visit and just have fun. The kids will be so happy and so entertained.
Like adults had so much fun, the kids and child-like me will really love it, highly recommended. It was an honor to be there and a good decision to visit the place.
I had more than enough fun and it’s time for me to celebrate 🥳. I went outside and choose amongst the many restaurants surrounding the Museum.
P 119 for already 3 pcs chicken with Drinks, rice and Fries!!! I mean look at that 🥳
2 hours well spent in that place. I had so much fun!!! Like I want more!!! I crave more!!! I can feel the itch of getting things done more!!! I am so excited.
When it comes to art, I am a loyal fan. It’s just very beautiful and so refreshing. I love creativity and skills and passion. It’s so precious to me!! Until next time Cebu Museum in Cordova!
Up next! “White Mansion” in Mactan!! I love art, I want to see that white illusions full of flowers. OMG! Can’t wait to see it. I am just so thrilled..
My mother is so like that and I’m so scared I might become. I am full of shame with my truth and how she treated me, but she still have the guts to question what I know about her.
I can still remember how she asked me “Where is your mother?” And put me to so much doubt about myself when she asked, ” Are you really beautiful?” She even bullied me for getting what I want.
Oh well, no matter how hard I will talk about her, she will just deny us. But I think that’s better. We will be able to move forward. But right now I enjoyed being a narcissist to them. I hope they will see who they are through me.
But nah, not too much though, I am still in control. I am so lucky to have good friends around who will always remind me of good values, professionalism and above all being spiritual.
At the back of my head, I am just like her, but I am so good at doing the right thing and assessing my thoughts and my emotions. This is called self therapy. I can be a good therapist. I hope one day I’d finally be able to decide whether to pursue it or not.
At least now I know that someone knew exactly how I felt and how I am being treated. Things I couldn’t even dare too share, too scared to be right. But then again, the truth will set us free. It’s the first step in dealing with our narcissistic Mother and a narcissistic self.
Hope all is well with you all. Fighting! Fighting to be good all the time. 💜 That’s why I love BTS, they’re just so precious to me. Thanks BTS! Thanks all behind BTS. Thanks much! Just thank you! Fighting with our mental health.
We came home safe and healthy; happy and very thankful and grateful. I went to the church lighting candles, thanking for the well spent vacation and keeping us safe no matter how we almost crushed two cars on our way back. Our bus driver drove so fast, though I kinda liked it. Hehe.
Me and 4 other friends went to Maravilla Beach 🏖️ to celebrate one of our friends 27th birthday.
It’s also a perfect get away for us from our day to day life in the City. It became my thank you time for me aside from the food treats I gave myself for doing her part in every day responsibilities.
We rented a Nipa Hut. It is called “Kubo” in cebuano. For P 1,500.00, we’re able to schedule a check in at 2PM Saturday and check out at Sunday 12:00 Noon. But because we lived in LLC, we arrived at the place at night around 8:00PM.
Going to the place was only 2 rides from Super Metro to North Bus Terminal for only P25-30 each (sorry I forgot, please comment the current and correct rate for our viewers). From North Bus Terminal, we were so lucky that we’re able to get the last meme bus last trip going to Maravilla.
We paid around P150 each ( but I think it’s only P115? Please comment if you know the exact rate, I was very sleepy..) I remember now, I gave Cess P200 pesos and I told her to give me back P 30 pesos. So it was P 170 each (but I’m still not sure, I was very sleepy and I forgot things.)
It was a little challenging for me because I still haven’t slept since I worked at night and got out at 7:00AM PH time. So I slept on the bus very uncomfortably. The road was bumpy and everytime I fell asleep I’d wake up either hitting the person sitting next to me with my head or almost laying on my seatmates shoulder.
It went on and on just like that, until finally, after many questions asked to the conductor if we’ve already reach Maravilla, we finally arrived. The cottage host waited for us. She’s with her white puppy and she looks cute in her pajamas. She welcomed us and guided us to their place.
It was a humble little Kubo and I am so glad we all feel welcomed. We borrowed their butane, unpacking and started cooking. And after they’ve cooked rice, we started eating with chicken lechon that Cess bought while in transit. It was quite a clever move. Thanks Cess, tummy’s the happiest with our budgeted cup of rice. It even made the food so precious and delicious like we just wanted more.
There was a lamp too. Electricity went off for awhile and we’re lucky to have Jas’s lamp on hand. We were like camping outside our rented Kubo . Stars started becoming visible and Vien started reminiscing her childhood days, when the cities not so crowded and people weren’t so attached to technologies.
Vien shared that’s advisable to look up at the stars sometimes to unwind and free your mind, she said it’s also a good way to relax. Thanks vien for that nice advise, I learned “How to free up my mind” easily now. It also reminded me of my childhood life at the province where I used to also look up at the stars when I am not doing anything. I remembered that feel at it was the happiest.
Now I can free up my mind whenever I think of toxic people that’s really hurting my emotions or whenever I am overthinking and cannot figure out how to come out from getting stuck of the repeating bad old thoughts that keeps me angry. So the instruction to look up is actually to “Look at the stars, specifically. Not just the sky because the sky is the limit. You can look at the stars if you want.”
After that, after finally getting ready to eat, we let our birthday 🎈🎉 celebrant make a wish and blow her candle.
We all gave reviews and it’s all 5 out of 0-5. Chocolate is yummy. I’m so thankful and grateful. It’s so yummy and I look so happy not because it’s her birthday but because cake is yummy 😛. Cess asked, “Are u really happy?” Then I realized I am. I’m happy it’s Lykas birthday otherwise no one will buy that yummy cake 😂. I’m so thankful and grateful.
We went to the beach and chilled..
We were supposed to night swim but it was low tide so we stayed on the shore and just talking about anything but specifically someone who was supposed to be with us but didn’t pursue it due to OT at work. We just wanted to get to know him, so that the next time we see him in person we’ll feel okay.
I went on a walk to see what’s out there. But also because I wanted to have lone time by myself. It was quite and very refreshing. I recorded few videos of the flowing water and my legs just walking peacefully. I uploaded it in our FB page not for this site, but for Team Lodis FB page for fan. A page of gratitude. Well, in case you want to see it, the link will be available in the comment section below, so check it out. Or you may check http://www.facebook.com/teamthrifters
Since we’re not able to swim, we decided to return home, sleep early and wake up by 4 AM to catch the sunrise at the beach early morning. But we ended up watching anime movies right after cleaning ourselves and changing into sleeping beauty with nice outfits.
I woke up early around 1 AM coz my body wants to pee. The CR won’t open so I had to wake up the birthday girl and told her it wouldn’t open. But when she did, it opened anyway. Thanks Lykes! We went back to sleep and woke up with Viens alarm, it was already 4:00 AM and nobody went back to sleep.
I learned to sing a new song by Josh. Bestfriend by Josh, he’s Chinese who sings English song and it’s so beautiful, I fell for it. Plus, there was this cute puppy, visiting us. We thought he belonged to the Kubo owner but it doesn’t.
look how cute this little one was:
I had to leave him at the Kubo. But after leaving towards the sea, the Grandma took the baby dog with her outside of the gate. She said, “I thought the puppy was yours so I took it with me outside, then someone found it. It’s owned by a neighbor who lived next next door.” We thought it was theirs, but it was not.
And while we’re away, we had the best summer in 2021! The place is so side and open. It was huge, it was clean. It was a beach. I mean a real one. The best beach I have been so far. It’s so clean. Dude, you’re going to enjoy it. The view and everything. For me, Maravilla is the most memorable place for me since it is where I learned how to Back Float. It’s a goal that I set aside but kept my mind open to still get it. And when I was ready, my teacher came.
I asked her, “How can I back-float?” I said, “I can float facing down but facing up. So she said, “If you can float like that, you can also back-float. The problem is that you’re scared of drowning, water gets into your nose, your neck isn’t relaxed.” It’s was the truth. I acknowledge the truth that “Yes Indeed! I hold my neck up instead of let it float.” She said, “Relax and let your body rest in the water as you’re actually laying down your bed.” So I did exactly as she said. First, I covered my nose and close my eyes, but then she said, “Open your eyes, let go of your nose, then just straightened your body.” So I did looked up and relaxed and I realized how beautiful the gray sky was.
After that, it rained heavily, and I let them drag my two legs to the side of the shore, while my head and arms are resting, including my eyes. Soon as the rain 🌧️ hits us, I can feel the cold breeze it was so cold. As cold 🥶 as so cold. We returned to our rented Kubo quickly and cooked for for lunch. It was a yummy meal. Oh the taste of the “Dried Fish” salty and yummy cooked with White Conching Rice.
It was a nice meal and a nice burp. We ended our stay at Maravilla by cleaning up the place. Getting all the garbages which were already in their cellopahes to that bug trashcan the Old lady gave us. Washing the dishes and throwing everything we no longer needed on our trip, while keeping those we can still eat and use.
After cleaning up and putting things back to where it was before, the table and the chair, the butane etc. Including our selves by the way, we also cleaned up ang get ready for our next destination. While chilling, we divided all the expenses we incurred on that one night stay into 5. We only paid, P 544.50 each. But I only had to pay for P 505 because I still have P 30 change from my P200 bus fair.
There is no time for delay, we hurried and paid our Bills and move on. Bid our goodbyes and went on to Tabuelan terminal via a tricycle for only P 50 each. Before we checked out, we decided to buy Lechon for our lunch. So as soon as we arrived at Tabuelan terminal, we automatically looked for lechon.
While doing that, the motorcycles were also negotiating with us. We negotiated P125 going up to Bluehole from the terminal. It was a little expensive for us so we let it sit for awhile and move on with being a Dora the Lechon explorer. They asked our final decision but let go of the driver since we still haven’t made up our minds yet. We let it calm down but the driver followed us and another one. I have to constantly say NO until the rest have decided.
We finally bought our Lechon and Puso. The task was being delegated by instinct. We knew what we have to do and do the part that we can and still haven’t done. While the other two was away, one actually met someone, our college classmates mother who had a store near Tabuelan terminal. We were being guided and advised to take the tricycle and a motorcycle instead. She said that it’s best to take the tricycle. So it was divided 3 by 2. The first motorcycle that had contact with actually followed us, and he’s the one who offered to get us a tricycle driver. He’ll gave our couple a motorcycle ride.
Finally, we made up our minds and went on. Oh Vien was a little not into it and the other. But it was on my list. It was my goal to go, so if they wouldn’t go I still would go. No one can stop me. We’re lost on our way up there, both drivers haven’t been there, so they asked people who knew and I ended up using Google map to guide our tricycle driver.
In the end, we arrived safely, but maybe it caused damages to my friends stomach, it was again a bumpy road and they showed disappointed faces they weren’t going to swim because it was crowded. They were all disappointed, so I paid the Table for only P 150 anyway. After all it was only me who wants to see the place and they weren’t just into it which was very understandable. It sounds like it’s my fault why I brought them there and they have to pay more 😂 Bleeh. But it was already approved at the GC a day before. So it was part of the plan, I shouldn’t have expressed so much interest in the area, but because of that, I saw something extraordinary and I learned a very important lesson.
“If you want something, do it yourself. You cannot get others approval because they have their own choice. It is their right to not like what you like to not always support you of your goals because they have their own goals to make as well. It’s the same pattern that goes on and on.”
These people are honest and it’s good. You cannot force them to support you unless they wanted it too. I am so blessed to have met them all. I’d rather have honest people around than few fake ones. It’s better to be hurt by the truth than to be happy with a lie. It’s better to see early signs which they already showed beforehand, but we didn’t listen because it’s part of our plan. It has to happen for better or for worst!
Although, it wasn’t what they expected to be and maybe it’s only me who have enjoyed the moment of being at Blue-hole, it still went well. The three others changed their minds and choose to deep their bodies in that very cold water. It was 6 feet deep and it’s the minimum deepness char. It was quite a thrill because we’re scared to get across the other side of the spring.
Oh it gave me a sense of relief knowing that Vien actually enjoyed her stay at the table. She guarded the place with our stuffs, I guess there was a reason why it all happened. She shared that while we’re away and she was alone, she was having fun listening to the boys in our next table, dancing, and just having fun.
She shared that she went to us but she wasn’t entertained, but she also understood that the three of us cannot see clearly from a far. We’re kinda blind 😂 and we weren’t wearing any glasses. Lyka can see but she didn’t look back because she also didn’t hear someone calling, so she also did not notice.
Thanks Vien for being so understanding! You’re very supportive as always even before on our college days which I mistook as a joke and a bully but you’re actually honest, “I just didn’t feel good about myself back then and it wasn’t your fault.” I will claim it now, “I’m pretty!” I hope you’ll claim yours too! “Pretty and so loving and intelligent.” A child-like heart like I also have.
I was once like you, who cannot see beauty in me, wondering about the truth. Should I believe or not? But believe me now “You’re so Beautiful Vien”, You are! Just like I was and still am 😂 char. We have to love ourselves or no one else will.
I graduated without honors but I’m glad YOU DID. At least one of us did 😉 and it’s more than enough! I’m glad you went. I’m glad you choose to be with us. Me and lyka will fight for our freedom and will do it gracefully. Our couple will face a new world and we will be here to support them by bettering our selves first then extending our graces to them!
Advance happy Wedding Day!!! 💓 You did all the cooking and we’re so blessed to have you both! 💜 Forgive us of our premonitions. Hahahaha – 😛! In the end of the day, we arrived home safely. They’re still searching who the real bride is, it’s actually me! 😛. I’m getting married and I am so happy!!!
Disapproval hurts, but you can mend it. It can break your self esteem or it can make you a record breaker. Just like how Suga Parents disapproval of his interest in music. But look at them now, breaking records after records.
So disapproval isn’t really a hindrance to your success. It is your choice that matters. It is the intensity of your desire that makes you rebel and follow your dreams no matter what. In the end of it all, your future is up to you. If he hadn’t fight for it, he wouldn’t have become this popular. Anyways I’m a fan!
Just like how my father disapproved of me to go to school. He wanted me to stop schooling at grade 5, and my choice to follow myself made me where I am today. It may not be the best of all the best, but it would have been worst if I hadn’t finished a degree.
There were times when I thought I wouldn’t be able to finish my school due to lack of finances, that time when I lost my scholarship because I got disqualified for 3rd year accountancy. My world almost collapsed. It was almost unbelievable that despite what happened, I still choose to pursue school “without thinking” who will support me financially.
That choice created a miracle. The University President’s daughter gave back our scholarship. It was amended, our letter was heard. It’s proof that when you believe in good things, good things will happen. I had to shift to another course but that failure traumatized me, threatened my future in education. But in the end, I Still succeeded. It may not be the course I choose, but I still did something and that’s finishing the race.
I wasn’t good in accounting, my major, but I was good in my minor subjects. But that’s not the problem, the real problem was that “I compared myself to those who are extremely good both in their major and minors. And spent time feeling bad about myself for not being good enough like them.” I could have been so much happier, but I did not. Because of the disapprovals that once took place.
The feeling of them not being happy of my success, and me not being thankful and grateful for it because I wasn’t supported by my father with my education, (which later on, he kinda changed) but I’m already older and doesn’t need his support. Even though I needed it, he still couldn’t support me because he hadn’t gone to school after his primary; chose to help his parents and have me instead.
His disapproval made me feel sad and unsupported. I constantly seek for approval growing up, lack of self confidence and not really showing up. But I did something that helped me recover, “I give myself approval.” That results to self pity, but I did something again, “I accepted myself”. Still not wholly, but I am getting there. “Self-Love is different from Self-pity.” When you self love, you’re doing something to help yourself. But self-pity is constantly feeling bad about yourself and not doing anything but hate it. Not giving yourself the best food, the best dress that you really wanted is a result of self pity.
“Love yourself first, then you can love others.” ☺️
I attended the Sunday Mass and I am so happy to have heard that my college classmate is going to get married. Once again, it was announced to the public and that was the 2nd time I heard one of my college classmates being scheduled to get married.
I am so happy for them. One of my closest friends is also going to get married this year, the other one already got a new big world with her daughter. I am here supporting them, seeing them transformed into something new. My first cousin just got married this year too, and my male cousin which I really hated haha is going to get married too.
It seems like everyone’s getting married. I even encouraged my brother to find a wife that would accept him for his life choices and would encourage him to become that better version of him. I like seeing them being happy and together. It fills my heart with joy seeing how complete families are. That’s because I never had that kind of family.
Mine was broken into half, I never had such loving parents, they were young and doesn’t know parenting, I learned everything by observing my elders and choosing good people to influence me. That way, I know I can be free. Even until now, I still choose whom to be with, but most of the time, I’d spend my time alone. It’s quite and I kinda like it. I have a friend in me. My child self wants to come out when she’s not being watched, but she can be herself when she’s with the right people. It’s good to be free. It’s nice to be your true self.
Sometimes, I think that maybe I am destined to be with people instead of them being with me, but I also have friends; we may not see each other often but one day you’ll find us get together at the most unexpected time, all unplanned; like it just happened; our destination just matches and we just say YES to anything we can do when the time comes; like it’s meant to be.
My time will come, but I feel like.. Hmm.. Maybe it’s not for me. It is also because I have such a bad experience with family and my perception of family is kinda distorted. I have so much healings to do, and I have so much dreams and goals to accomplish. I wanted it with someone but I think it’s not going to happen. That’s probably why it’s not happening to me yet because I closed my mind about family, it felt too ugly for me; I can only hear my mothers negativities at the back of my mind, my father cheating on her; all those bad thoughts and her difficulties in believing it really happened; so full of drama; it’s like a recording that’s playing in the background.
Her confusion confuses me and it’s scary because it also happened to me, I had that fear of becoming either one of them and it’s just so scary. The shame that they both feel is just crazy. Me and brother just laughed at it. I wonder how my younger brother felt, being gossiped as a product of adultery just because his parents weren’t married. I hope one day when he’s grown older and was able to conquer shame, he’d find a way to keep his family; and as a sister, I am just right here willing to support him.
It is our joy to see them complete. Me and my bro have each other until we have chosen the right one for us. As the preaching says last Sunday, we only have one God, regardless of our religion, we call on to one God. Just like we may have different mothers but we have the same father. We are maybe boys and girls but we’re destined to marry one happy spirit. They may look different from each other, but they share the same life purpose.
Just like, I may not marry JK of BTS but I will marry JK-like someone. For sure there’s a lot of people like him, I just haven’t met them yet, but one day I will. I would definitely like to marry someone who can make me laugh like crazy 😂😋. I still have a lot to do. I still have to grow more and more and more until I am strong enough to stand on my own without falling into dependency. Until then, I’ll just be happy, knowing that my time will also come, I just have to grow a little more each day😊.
It’s clear to me now. It is clear to me how different my life is when I am being with the real people. Real people is happy to be with. They believe in you and your abilities. Most importantly, they trusted you. No sense of doubts as long as you’re honest with them.
In short, being a real person without any mask on pretending to be someone you aren’t, attracts real people. That means, if you are being fake to someone, you’ll also see a fake them. What you sow is what you reap and it’s always true
If you want to attract people who believes in you, and if you want them to stay, then be true to them. No need to be fake, because if you do, the real people will run away from you because they just can’t fake you, or else, if they choose to stay, they’ll become the fake version of them which you wouldn’t like.
So if you want to see the real them, be real to them, most of the time they’ll like you for being who you really are. If they don’t, at least you can see it and then you can move on from there. Good things will happen like attracting real good people in your life. Being your true self, will attract true people. You will lost the fakers but at least you’ll find the realist.
No need to be sad, it’s your fault that they faked you. In the first place, you’re the one faking it. But seldomly, you’ll find your best friends who can see you beyond your fake self. They somehow knew when you’re faking and will just reveal the truth about you and it felt crazy but it’s the truth about you, you just can’t hide it.
I am blessed to have such friends, who can see through my hidden agendas. It’s kinda crazy but it felt great, at least you can be true to yourself even if it’s a real shame in your part. Sometimes, shame when faced with acceptance and openness for change will become a source of great happiness and bless.
In the end of the day, whatever happens, happened. You cannot changed what already happend, but you can always change the future, now. I mean do it now. Same situation in the past can happen anytime soon, and it’s your chance to do the right thing. The only way you can do the right thing is by accepting what has gone wrong. What you did wrong in the past. By facing that truth with forgiveness, you can move on from there and change that bad story into a good ending.
It’s weekend! Finally, I can unwind and feel free from the weekdays. I must make every weekend memorable and enjoyable! I am so thankful and grateful no matter what. I must learn to see the bright side of me to continue to feel good and do good.
I remember the last time I focused on my bad side, I stopped my self from doing the things I really wanted. When the wrong people direct me to become the bitter me, I started getting angry, but soon as I recognize the right people who can make me feel okay and become my better self, I can win it.
Getting stuck in one bad thought about you is enough to ruin your day, just like embracing one good thing about you can make your day magnificent and successfull. All you need is one powerful thought about you or someone or something that can trigger all the other good thoughts about you, and the rest will follow.
Seek ye first thy kingdom of God and everything will be added unto you. Seek the love of God, his good people, his food, his friends, and his believers. Thinking of the good things that happened to you. The prayers that have been heard, you are the most luckiest.
That time when you’re about to die, and you prayed and call on his name, submitted, believed and trusted in his power to give you life, you are being heard. If you call unto God as strong as evil call upon satan, God will hear you. The only difference is that who you call for.
When all of us have the same mighty power that we can use either for destruction or for healing, it’s up to us what to choose. If you can’t choose because you’re doubting your abilities, then you’re nothing, so be something. You can do it! Trust that you can, this time. Just do it. Trust in the God that will lift you up when you fall. You know what I mean. Relax and fly my friend 💜
I have committed myself to do things I haven’t done before or anything that I haven’t mastered yet. If I want to make friends and be able to socialize a bit, then I must come out and let go of my fear while keeping my guard up.
We can still enjoy even if we’re careful, if we’re with the right people. Good food with good people, doesn’t make you bad, so it’s really okay to be yourself around them.
Conquering my fear of getting to know new people, meeting them up and just talk a bit really made me happy. Although sometimes, I cannot relate to them, I can still catch up by learning and being happy with them.
It’s cool to learn new things, it keeps you moving. Keeping your heart open to new knowledge, new people, is the best gift you can give to your self. I am already excited for May 29th adventure. I will be seen by the mountains again. I will experience the place and the best they will offer.
But for now, until that day will come, let’s eat up! Celebrating May 11th 2020 of the year. It’s the year that I finally got my super ideal work like super! We are so blessed and so supported by our company and I feel like “I’m so special” receiving treatment that I always wanted to have. I feel like I deserve it and I am so driven to prove them right for having me.
To all my friends and family who silently care about me which I have sometimes misunderstood as pity over me, thank you! I am able to this and that and you have contributed a little to it. But my faith in him and my trust in her made me feel so strong. I claim it.
May the love of the Angelic Beings be with you as you finished reading my really short message of gratitude. Like how lucky I am to still be alive at this very moment, having the chance of writing down my thoughts. I am very thankful and grateful to our company for making this possible. I am just so blessed that I found my grace in you. I am in good hands!
“Imagine it happening the way you want it to be and the universe will find ways to help you get it! That’s how important you are as long as it will make you happy.” Beu